He was nice

So. The blind date was okay. Yes, just okay. In fact, walking home from it my friend Jim texts me to ask how it was and I tell him, "He was nice."

Jim: Nice? Uh oh.

Me: What? He was nice! That's alright.

Jim: Nice isn't very enthusiastic. It's what you say when they're boring.

Me: No, it was fine. It was good.

Jim: Is he funny?

Me: Not really. I mean, his email was funny but he didn't make me laugh once. I, on the other hand, was very amusing.

Jim: Are you going to go out with him again?

Me: Probably. I mean, first dates are terrible. I should go out with him again.

Jim: Should? Again...

Me: Fine, I want to go out with him again.

Jim: Do you?

Me: No. Maybe. I don't know. But I will.

It was kind of terrible. He at least paid. But he was late. He didn't know where he was going so instead of leaving lots of time to find his way, find parking and be on time, he was just late. That is a *huge* judging factor for me. Especially on a first date. If I can offer any advice to daters it is: BE. ON. TIME.

The second would be that the guy should pay for the first date. I know, I know, how very unfeminist of me, but it shows you are wooing us, courting us, and that it is, in fact, a date. After that first one I don't care if we go "dutch" to eternity, but GAWD MAN! Pay for that first date! At least this guy got one of two right.

Now, this guy, lets call him... Bud. No, I don't know why, it's arbitrary. So Bud tells me he's never really ever dated. Properly. He is recently divorced so he has had at least one relationship, but, as he explains, he never dated, just sort of fell into relationships with friends. This is not surprising and in fact, once revealed, makes so much clear. An "Aha!" moment, if you will. And then he actually asks, "So, how am I doing? Am I doing okay here?" Sigh.

Okay, so, good on him for trying to find out. But suddenly I feel less like I'm on a date than a test drive. The practice run for when he will really date someone. Whatever. Maybe he just really wants to know, and doesn't know, and doesn't think it's weird to ask. So fine. I tell him he's doing okay. I could have told him he shouldn't be late, and that he shouldn't ask how its going, should be able to tell, but hey, maybe he *should* ask that. The former still holds though. Again, don't be late!

So the stiltedness continues, a couple of awkward silences. I am the one starting all the conversations, asking the questions, making him laugh. I'm carrying the whole. Damned. Date. At the end, which I rush along (he wants to go for a walk; I have to "get home to do some over-time") he asks, "What do we do here? Do we just walk away? Shake hands? Hug? Kiss?"

Nice try Bud, but no, no kiss. I say, "How about a hug?"

We do, we make small talk about "next time" and then I leave to walk home. Another mistake. Offer me a ride! I would probably say no on a first date, but definitely offer.

So yes, I will go on date number two. But I will also be drilling the friend who set us up for a little more info on why he thinks we should date. Because both of us being single is simply *not* good enough.